Trees and Seedlings

As I awaken each morning there is a tree on the south side of the house that is visible from my bed through the window. I watch this tree each morning, 365 days a year, and now have watched it since 2017. That does not seem like a long time considering, not only my life of 60+ years but, this tree’s life of what might be many more! I do not know its history, how long it has been there or what it has seen. What I do know and all that is relative to me is what I have witnessed while looking the window at this tree.

Bella Coola BC

Each morning as I awaken, open my eyes, stretch, I look for the tree. It dawned on me today I somewhat take it for granted that it will be there and sadness filled my heart knowing my brother recently had to take down a large beloved maple tree in his back yard because it had become dis-eased and was dangerously dying a slow death. It could have fallen on people and the house. They had doctored it, supported it, propped it and loved it however the day had come when end of life was upon them. The mourning started, planning vigil and saying goodbye was imminent. The tree has now transformed back to the land and the stump remains.

The sadness I feel for him as he looks at the stump came over me this morning as I appreciated my tree; I call it “my tree” even though it is not “mine” for many reasons. I looked out today and genuinely felt an overwhelming thankfulness for the tree and all that I have endured in the last years. This tree and I have seen storms aplenty and have both weathered them well. We have scars and wounds yet still stand strong.

Yesterday, I planted seedlings in the garden and left them there to take root and grow. I worried as I looked to the sky and the clouds were grey and dark. For the first time I feared a coming weather storm would pummel my precious seedlings. How do farmers stand it?! These seedlings are not my livelihood! The storm did not amount to anything last night so my seedlings have a chance to strengthen before they face another day.

This tree, these seedlings are precious reminders of life’s journey, spiritual awakenings and rites of passage. The tree gives me hope and strength that season after season it weathers whatever Mother Nature offers. My seedlings may live on or they may die in the elements; it is now out of my hands. I seeded them and they must survive on their own now. My children are in their 30’s with children of their own and my little seedlings have weathered and matured well. I am blessed. As the birds sing, now while I write, the tree sways, the sun shines, the earth rotates, and I am here in this moment where all that matters is at hand. I am exactly where I need to be … in the now! I have let go of all my seedlings, allowing the divine source, God if you will, spiritual guidance to take over and bring life where life is to be, leaving room for joy. Letting die where death is necessary and allow for mourning to take place. What will be will be revealed as we need to know it, all in perfect timing; no fear and no promise. The seeds of tomorrow have potential in them… plant them and let them go …

May you plant your seeds and let them go in love and faith, finding your own tree of assurance that all is right in the world and as it should be.

Fresh rain on the leaves ..

Published by #breakingstibah

Years of learning about my own inner world has brought me to teach others. Grief, loss, bereavement, sadness are all parts of joy, love, compassion and desire. Without one set the other is lost.

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